why I attract creepy weirdos

A conversation Mandy and I had about men...

Me: "I don't get why I only attract creepy weirdos."

Mandy: "Because you treat them like people.  They aren't used to that so they think you are attracted to them."

Hmmm....

I kind of want to stitch this into a pillow.

mañana

Ok so let's face it.  I can't stand not working.  I'm getting bored and feeling lazy.  I watched two episodes of Mad Men today and all I can think about is all of those messed up relationships and all of the scandals and the affairs.  It's disgusting.  I went running and I just kept wondering who Don was going to sleep with next and if Pete ever finds out that Peggy had his baby.


SICK!!!!!!


What the hell is wrong with me?


So I've decided that even though I don't have to, I'm going to work at least 15 hours per week.  Flowers, babysitting, catering, whatever.


And I'm going to make some lists of things that need to get done around here and quit saying "mañana" whenever I think about all of the things that could be done... because it's depressing me.


Maybe if I write them here I'll feel like I have to get them done since everyone in the blogoshere knows about them.


Accountability.


List:
- write a letter I should have written about 8 months ago
- clean out attic
- get rid of all of that stupid paint in the basement
- clean the basement
- tear down that stupid disintegrating wall in the basement
- sweep the steps
- wash the rugs
- weed
- mow the lawn before it reaches my waste
- write that thank you note
- make 30 pairs of mittens
______________________________


ok.  I'll start with that.  I don't want to get too ambitious.

missing car parts... genetics

The other day I drove to Mason to get my brakes fixed.  My dad is my mechanic so I met him at his house and then we took the car across the street to the garage.  When we talked about fixing my brakes he said he could show me how to do it and I could do it myself.  Instead, I just decided to take a seat on the lawn mower while he worked.


He took the tire off.


Then took some parts off.


Then he went out to his car to get a tool.


Then he went to the other garage to get some other tool.


Then he took some more parts off.


He got the new parts out of the boxes.


Then he started grumbling.


I said, "What's the matter?"


He said, "I don't know what I did with the damn part."


I said, "What part?"


He said, "A bracket."


I said, "What does it look like?"


He said, "Like this but a little bigger maybe."


He pointed to the piece to the right in this photo.

Pay attention to the rest of the story.


After we both spent about a half hour looking around the garage and looking in the trunk of his car and looking in the other garage he left everything and started working on the other brake pad.  


I said, "What the heck did you do with it?"


He said, "I dunno you'll have to find it, I'm busy!"


hmmm.


I texted my mother who gave me some advice I could have used before this whole project started.


After I told her that he couldn't find the part she proceeded to give me the following information.


"Well you are supposed to watch him keep track of stuff.  That's what I always did.  Then if he starts acting weird you say oh what's wrong and then you can say oh I think maybe it's over there."


Anyways, I went over to the other side where he was working and stood over him watching to see if I could figure out which part he was looking for.  When he looked at me I said, "I just need to know what the part looks like so I know when I find it."


"It looks just like that."


"And there is only one?"


"Yeah."


"Come here please."


We walk to the other side of the car where we "lost" the piece.


I point to the piece you see at the bottom right of this photo.

And I say, "That piece?"


__________________________________


Ladies and gentlemen that is the end of the story.  


I am still laughing.


__________________________


While trying to help him find the "missing piece" I chose not to say anything like, "well it's got to be around here somewhere" or "where did you last see it" because I lose things all the time and have no idea what I did with them and get even more frustrated when people ask such dumb questions.


This must be hereditary. 
I have to go look for my keys now.

search key words

I have a few favorite blogs.  Two of them belong to my dear cousins Linda and Adie.  A few weeks ago they mentioned the search key words that bring people to their blogs.  So today I'd like to address a few issues about hedgehogs, children and 50 year olds because for some reason everyone finds my blog when they have questions about these things.


a.  hedgehogs are like little porcupines
b.  i really love children between the ages of 0-4
c.  i hope that when i am 50, i will be at least as half as cool as many of the 50 year olds i know today

polar opposites... anniversaries

So this whole non-work situation and the fact that it is September, have put me in quite a reflective state.


During my 31 years of life I have discovered that life is confusing, strange, terrible and wonderful... among many other adjectives.


September is a weird month for me.  It's wrought with bittersweet anniversaries.  September always seems to approach and I inevitably ask myself if I'll ever forget that damn date and just simply let September pass as if it were May or July or some other ordinary month.  Sometimes I wonder if something is wrong with me for not forgetting.


But today I realized that sometimes even downright bad anniversaries can be remembered with sweetness.  Four years ago today I found out that some people I trusted and loved very much, had done some terribly hurtful things.  My heart was ripped into a million pieces in a matter of seconds.  


In the days, weeks, months and years to come, the amount of love that I received from the people in my life was a thousand times more than the amount of hatred and lack of love that was displayed in the actions of those "friends."  


I did not deserve their betrayal.


But I also have done nothing to deserve your love.


I never. ever. ever. want to feel that way again but at the same time, I'd give anything to go back to some of those moments where many of you extended your love in ways that I will cherish forever.


It's as if god saw what was happening and pained by the evil that had overwhelmed me, he decided to overwhelm me with love.


I can't figure out any other way to explain it.


With that said I want to thank you.  


Thank you for feeding me, clothing me, giving me a place to sleep, watching me, singing to me, sitting with me, listening, crying with me, embracing me, praying for me and never leaving my side.  Thank you for waking up in the middle of the night and giving me something for my splitting headache.  Thank you for the Ambien.  Thank you for the wine.  Thank you for your children.  Thank you for your patience and faithfulness.        


I do not deserve you.  I love you and hope that I can in some way reciprocate the love that you have given so generously to me.



beauty
   for
     ashes


joy
  for
 mourning


praise
    for
 a spirit of heaviness


is. 61:3


I am grateful for the exchange.
____________________________________


And one of the reasons I like photos like this and seeing this happen in nature is because it reminds me of what can come from seemingly hopeless situations.

And it's also one of the many reasons I love my friend Alynn Guerra's artwork.

no more manic mondays

Today was glorious.

I woke up at six.

It was raining.

I did laundry.

I drank coffee.

I cut up tomatoes.

I read.

I went to yoga.

I walked to class.

Conclusion:  

Sometimes seemingly bad situations, can actually be good for us. 

Sometimes being forced into transition is better than comfort.

little people with big hearts

Yesterday morning I was walking with some friends at a fundraising event I helped plan and coordinate.  Megan's daughter overheard our conversation about how I no longer have a job.  She's three going on four.  The following conversation got me to thinking about how much love I feel every day from so many friends and family.


Kirra: "Shelby, you don't have a job anymore?"
Me: "Nope. Today is my last day."
Kirra: "Why?"
Me:  "Because they didn't have enough money to pay me anymore."
Kirra: "Oh so you don't have money anymore."
Me: "Nope, I don't have money now."
Kirra: "And if you don't have any money then you don't have food!"
Me: "That's right.  Once the food runs out at my house I'll have to come over and rummage through your cupboards."
Kirra: "Shelby you can come to our house and eat our food.  We will cook it for you."
Me: "Thanks Kirra!"
Kirra: "And Shelby you can live with us as long as you need to."


Many other things have happened over the last several days that have been a reminder of how much love there is in my little world.


I have no complaints.

Extended Vacation Day 1: "you gotta love yourself"

Today I met up with some girls from one of my classes.  We are working on a community project.  We spent the afternoon walking through a neighborhood talking to its residents.  One lady in particular captured our hearts.  We spent the good part of an hour chatting with her.  She has lived in her home on that corner for 39 years, was married 47 years before her husband passed and raised 7 children.  She is 79 years old and one of the happiest ladies I have ever met.


Her advice to us, "Be happy with who you are.  You gotta love yourself or you're never gonna be happy."


I think I could sit on Miss Ella's porch all day.
_______________________


I also had breakfast and a walk with a friend.


An early morning jog by the river and coffee with a friend.


An afternoon walk around the lake and good heart-felt talk with another friend.


I made homemade spaghetti sauce that I put cayenne pepper in because at first I thought I wanted to make salsa.  It's delicious but a little surprising.  It really made me wonder why I don't have men knocking on my door wanting to be my life partner.

some little girl stopped and gave me that flower on my walk

I also spilled nearly an entire container of raisins, which looked a lot like rabbit turds on the floor of my pantry.


And the day ended like this...

And everyone was content.

the day has come... the antifungal cream mix up

I don't think I need to explain what just happened.  I think the picture can speak for itself.  Let's just say I've almost made this mistake on countless occasions and have wondered when I'd actually do it.

se pincho la llanta... beer & bus stops

The other day Alynn texted me.  She wanted to know if I'd join her on some group bike ride that starts at 9pm on Division and ends around 11pm at Founders.


Sure.


About 20 minutes into the ride, several miles from downtown and after hitting several bumps, I realize my front tire had popped.


So we ditched the group and started walking back toward downtown.  Conveniently, we weren't too far from a bus stop and even more conveniently, the bus station is across the street from Founders.


Alynn decided that since we had a twenty minute wait at the bus stop we had better take care of the beers in her bag.


So we did.


We drank beer at the bus stop.

The bus came before I was able to finish mine.


And Alynn's bike is huge and heavy and we looked like a couple of clowns trying to put it on the bike rack.


This story is better told in person.


I imagine my mother is rolling her eyes and wondering what happened to her responsible daughter.


She left.