Monday, January 24, 2011

pathetic, sloth-like slumber... loathing winter...

Today's post is inspired by the following lines from 30 Rock.  Yesterday I got home from my Sunday evening ritual with Sara at Camp Tall Turf around 10:00pm and realized I hadn't watched an episode yet.  30 Rock might just be the only thing keeping me sane this winter.   

Liz: Work is awful. Everyone’s snippy and tense.
Jack: Well the lack of sun makes people depressed. It’s called “seasonal affective disorder.”
Liz: Oh, is that where the word “sad” comes from?
Jack: What? You think “sad” is an acronym invented by psychologists?

I'm currently blaming my cynicism on the below zero temperatures, lack of sunlight and the salt that's ruining my new boots.  This weather leaves me buried beneath my covers for several of my waking hours each day.  I don't think I have ever spent this much time sitting in my bed watching sitcoms and videos on youtube and thinking about the misery that comes with winter.  I sit there fantasizing about riding my bicycle and sweating or going for a run in shorts and a tank top.  I nostalgically look at photos on facebook from warm days gone by either from last summer or my previous life in Latin America, where 'cold' never dropped below fifty.  FIFTY!!!!  That's like 54 degrees warmer than it was yesterday when I got out of bed.  That's ridiculous.

While complaining to my mother about how terribly awful my life has become she gave me two options.  "Shelb, you either need to start exercising more or get some anti-depressants to get you through the winter."  The last time I took those pills I walked around like a zombie and cared about nothing.  I stopped taking them and swore I'd never take them again.  It was like they took all of my powers to think and feel and turned my insides to mush.  I don't know what's worse... being apathetic about everything or believing that I have nothing to live for except 30 Rock and wine.

So I opted for exercise.  I'm crazy enough without the pills.  Today I got up at 4:55am and went to the gym.  I hate spinning on a stationary bicycle in a room with a bunch of sweaty smelly people I don't know and there's nothing worse than running around in circles on the track.  But, it will release some serotonin in my brain and I keep telling myself that it will lift my spirits, just wait for it.  I will leave this pathetic sloth-like slumber before spring hits, I promise.  I'm going to listen to Tom Petty now and think of flowers and sunshine and palm trees.

3 comments:

  1. I know the exact same feeling, it's over here in the tropics where its warm and nice as well, it's not the weather...but honestly, as I have felt like that I as the Chief, how are you having it today? I tell you, He must have it rough...

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  2. I just got a fitness USA membership thanks to my mother-in-law. That place (I don't know if you've ever been) is weird if you ask me. But I have felt better since having the access and actually working out 3 xs/week...I hate winter. So, keep goin, I think it will help you. Also, if you don't already, some vitamin D supplement might help too :)

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  3. @abbie - Ha ha.. fitness USA. I still have a membership because we got them when they offered a life time membership. I can go there for the rest of my life. I agree though, the place is weird. I mean it is nice that there are no men there to hear grunting and staring at their muscles in the mirror. I thought about the vitamin D supplements last year but got overwhelmed in the vitamin aile and ran out of meijer more depressed than when i entered. maybe i'll go to a small shop where they can actually help me. i ran 9.4 miles yesterday... getting back into it.

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