This morning I woke up to a text that said "please, do yourself a favor and never get married." I later learned what it was referring to, but it really got me to thinking.
If the married people I know, say this to me, is this something I should desire? If the married people I know have to suffer through their spouse's mid-life crisis, do I really wish that upon myself? I mean think about it... I'm 31, the midlife crisis isn't that far off... we wouldn't have many good years before they got miserable. Just sayin'
I decided definitively, that no, I should not.
Friend... I'll do myself the favor!
I will just hang out and make out and then come home to my peaceful little house at night. Alone.
The only problem is that sometimes one has a desire to have children so I had to think about how I would remedy this.
Solution:
Instead of becoming a cranky old spinster I will strive to become the cool aunt-like figure in the lives of my friend's children.
So, in an effort to begin this new sort of life...
I sent an email.
I went to see the boys I used to babysit every Tuesday.
We went on a walk.
We ate ice cream.
We got caught in the rain.
We had the wrong keys and entered the house through the window.
We jumped in puddles.
No one had a time out.
No kid ever gets mad at their fun aunt...
I get to come home and do what I want and sleep until I want and no one ever complains. Except me. And I don't get too bothered by my own complaints.
I.
Am.
Living.
The.
Life.
Plus, I wore shorteralls ALL day. If you don't know what shorteralls are then you should watch this video. If you do know what shorteralls are then you should watch this video.
maybe you should skip the shorteralls. if you want to do the making out and hanging out with anybody even remotely normal, that is.
ReplyDeletejust a thought.
I have seen every episode of 30 Rock. Why can I not remember the shorteralls episode!?
ReplyDeleteI don't know Adie because it's one of the best ones. You're going to need to figure out which episode it is and watch it. It's hilarious.
ReplyDeleteI'm wondering if the married men who have a mid-life crisis are prone to it because their wives wear shorteralls, figuring it doesn't matter since they've already snagged a man. NOT that it's a good excuse, just keep that in mind if you ever do end up married with children. (I think I threw mine out about 5 years ago.)
ReplyDeleteI don't know what everyone's problem with shorteralls is... I mean when all you are doing all day is moving flowers and jumping in puddles. It's not like I wear them to go out to a nice dinner. They are cool and have paint stains on them.
ReplyDelete